An American, a Japanese and an Irishman were sitting naked in a sauna. Suddenly there was a beeping sound. The American pressed his forearm and the beep stopped. The others looked at him questioningly.

“That was my pager,” he said. “I have a microchip under the skin of my armpit”

A few minutes later a phone rang. The Japanese guy lifted his palm to his ear. When he finished he explained, “That was my mobile phone. I have a microchip in my hand.”

Paddy felt decidedly low-tech. So as not to be outdone, he decided he had to do something just as impressive. He stepped out of the sauna and went to the toilet. He returns with a piece of toilet paper sticking out of his arse. The others raised their eyebrows, “Will you look at that” says Paddy, “I’m getting a fax.”